Ambivalence of decisions
Life is full of decisions. Your morning should start with tea or coffee? Your workout session should be cardio or weight training? You want to eat sweet or spicy? Veg or Non-veg? We all know, the list can go on and on....
However, taking these decisions are rather easy. It starts to get complex as we start increasing the level. How about choosing your aim? Whether to go with science, humanities or commerce? Give more time to yourselves or family? A laptop or a bike? I believe we all have experienced these situations. And they really bother you, don't they? Even after giving a considerate amount of time, you are still unsure and equivocal. Why?
Lets go to next level. How about choosing between father or mother? To Choose between children or parents? To save for the future or to spend for the present? To pay the child's school fee or to pay the emi? Things get ugly here, don't they?
I know you have answers to my questions. You are welcome to comment below. But let me guess. You are thinking of finding a middle route, aren't you?
You are thinking why can't we take tea and coffee on alternate days. We can do both cardio and weight. We can eat both veg and non-veg. We can happily live with both children and parents. We don't have to choose between our parents. We can manage fees and emi.
Well, I appreciate your thoughts but what to do when situation demands an unilateral decision. What if you HAVE to choose no matter what. What if time and situation have not given the option of a middle route?
Now, the thoughts in your mind begin to tumble. You try hard to push yourself to make a decision. But you can't. The Good and Evil start playing with you. The dichotomy of the situation starts to tear your mind and heart apart.
What to do? Whether to favor brain or heart?
If you favor brain, then you take rational and practical decisions, but they can be really ugly for you as well as for others. Plus, they can be highly devoid of empathy or emotions. Your brain has the potential to tear apart the emotional bonds just like a piece of paper. But, as I said, they are practical, rational, often correct, and right.
On the other hand, if you favor heart, you take empathetic, kind and generous decisions. It will soothe your soul. You will feel peaceful. But, they can be highly impractical and irrational. It can hamper your logical thinking. It can deviate you from your path.
We can take a example to feel this. Let us assume, you are passing by a road in the middle of the night. You see a beggar, pathetic and dull, devoid of life, crying and asking for help. When you ask, what is the matter. He tells you, his 5 year old daughter is injured and needs immediate help. Now, what will you do?
Your heart immediately tells you to follow the beggar to his home. Take his daughter to the nearest hospital. Provide all help that you can. You start feeling sad about the beggar. Your emotions starts getting stronger. You start cursing this world, humanity, even god. Your brain has similar response too.
But, at the same time,
Your brain alerts you. It reminds you that it is midnight. You are alone. You don't know if beggar is telling truth or he is lying. Whether it is a plot of robbery? Whether it is a plot to indulge you into an accident case.
Now, what will you do? Whether you will go with brain or heart?
Some people think that it is non-sense to think otherwise. You should immediately help him. You ought to take risk, when someone's life is in danger. Thinking about yourself in a situation like this is selfish and egoist.
However, they forget that you have your family too. Your wife, children and parents are waiting for you. You are the only bread winner for your family. If any untoward thing happens to you, your family will meet the same fate as this beggar.
People try to find altruistic and grandiloquent answers. But, that doesn't help. And you know it well.
So, what to do? This question has bothered us since our childhood and still bothers us. I have bothered you again.
Your comments and feedbacks are always welcome. 😊
Lets go to next level. How about choosing between father or mother? To Choose between children or parents? To save for the future or to spend for the present? To pay the child's school fee or to pay the emi? Things get ugly here, don't they?
I know you have answers to my questions. You are welcome to comment below. But let me guess. You are thinking of finding a middle route, aren't you?
You are thinking why can't we take tea and coffee on alternate days. We can do both cardio and weight. We can eat both veg and non-veg. We can happily live with both children and parents. We don't have to choose between our parents. We can manage fees and emi.
Well, I appreciate your thoughts but what to do when situation demands an unilateral decision. What if you HAVE to choose no matter what. What if time and situation have not given the option of a middle route?
Now, the thoughts in your mind begin to tumble. You try hard to push yourself to make a decision. But you can't. The Good and Evil start playing with you. The dichotomy of the situation starts to tear your mind and heart apart.
What to do? Whether to favor brain or heart?
If you favor brain, then you take rational and practical decisions, but they can be really ugly for you as well as for others. Plus, they can be highly devoid of empathy or emotions. Your brain has the potential to tear apart the emotional bonds just like a piece of paper. But, as I said, they are practical, rational, often correct, and right.
On the other hand, if you favor heart, you take empathetic, kind and generous decisions. It will soothe your soul. You will feel peaceful. But, they can be highly impractical and irrational. It can hamper your logical thinking. It can deviate you from your path.
We can take a example to feel this. Let us assume, you are passing by a road in the middle of the night. You see a beggar, pathetic and dull, devoid of life, crying and asking for help. When you ask, what is the matter. He tells you, his 5 year old daughter is injured and needs immediate help. Now, what will you do?
Your heart immediately tells you to follow the beggar to his home. Take his daughter to the nearest hospital. Provide all help that you can. You start feeling sad about the beggar. Your emotions starts getting stronger. You start cursing this world, humanity, even god. Your brain has similar response too.
But, at the same time,
Your brain alerts you. It reminds you that it is midnight. You are alone. You don't know if beggar is telling truth or he is lying. Whether it is a plot of robbery? Whether it is a plot to indulge you into an accident case.
Now, what will you do? Whether you will go with brain or heart?
Some people think that it is non-sense to think otherwise. You should immediately help him. You ought to take risk, when someone's life is in danger. Thinking about yourself in a situation like this is selfish and egoist.
However, they forget that you have your family too. Your wife, children and parents are waiting for you. You are the only bread winner for your family. If any untoward thing happens to you, your family will meet the same fate as this beggar.
People try to find altruistic and grandiloquent answers. But, that doesn't help. And you know it well.
So, what to do? This question has bothered us since our childhood and still bothers us. I have bothered you again.
Your comments and feedbacks are always welcome. 😊
Relying too much on our heart, and this would led to dangerous and impulsive decisions with harmful consequences.
ReplyDeleteRelying too much on our head, this will be quite risky.
But What's life without any risk and adventures. Isn't it?!!!!
So it's always a blend of Heart and mind.🙌
Yes indeed. And this blend is very chaotic.
DeleteWhen we need to be conclusive then if we tacle the things using our brain, I think we will be able to solve the problems from every aspect bcoz the brain uses its intelligence(will favour those solutions with more no. Of positive probability), simplest way and by enquiring both the positive and negative aspects of our problems.
ReplyDeleteIf the brain responses with intelligence then I don't think we should be troubled out more as an intelligent brain will always serve for most parts of our problems, it might be unpleasant for that moment bt will be better for our next steps.
Our heart may take decisions which "will seem" to be fair "for the present span", but it later might complicate the situation more than before. As u said, it resembles the decisions being empathic and decreases our ability to think over it.
(U may have a got a live example😅😅👊)